Christina Aguilera hailing a cab: "heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!”
*listens to arctic monkeys for the first time*
*5 minutes later*
On the set of Doctor Who at Mermaid Quay, Cardiff Bay, on 25 February, 2014 [x]
#i am gonna die oh my god#this is the girl who dressed up as a dalek#who had#autism and took matt’s regeneration in a bad way#so she was nervous about meeting capaldi#but he reassured her#and was loving on her#and this girl was scared that since she was a dalek#he’d shun her since it was a past monster#like whoa i am fucking done#pcap wins my heart - damecooper
i think you’re suffering from a lack of vitamin me
Phosphenes n. the stars and colors you see when you rub your eyes.
a homeless guy just said to me “do you tell jokes to make people laugh or to make people think you’re funny” and that is the most profound shit ive ever experienced
RIGHT IN THEIR LITTLE SPIDER ASSHOLE
dude idk what ur into but I’m not gonna judge
My 99 year old great grandfather was at my house for Christmas and we were watching cake boss because it’s his favourite show, except it was already recorded so I fast forwarded through the commercial and my grandpa screamed and said “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? ARE YOU TIME TRAVELLING?? ELLIE YOU CAN’T DO THAT”
"you use too many commas in your writing" you gonna comma over here and stop me
OH MY GOD
SO I LIVE NEXT TO A VERY STRICT, VERY BIG, CHRISTIAN FAMILY AND ALL OUR WINDOWS ARE OPEN AND I JUST SCREAMED “JESUS FUCK” REALLY LOUD AND I HEARD 3 MORTIFIED GASPS FROM OUTSIDE IM CRYING
I can smell this shit through my screen, it’s not cute, and it’s not as subtle as you think. If your only way of getting my attention is to politely insult me at random, why bother?
I even had a guy who was auditioning for my band pull this shit on me. Dude, you’re supposed to be trying to impress me with your musical skils, not trying to land me with this ass-backwards bullshit. It makes me sad because it is always SO obvious, but I’m sure that eventually, it probably ends up working on someone.
This is how it usually goes: